Onward Christian Soldiers


The book titles alone should be enough to get you interested (and laughing): You, The Warrior Leader; The Barbarian Way; Fight on Your Knees; God’s Gift to Women.
Jeff Sharlet, a research professor at New York University’s Center for Religion and Media, takes on the upsurge of Christian men’s books in a recent Nerve article:
…What’s sad about books like God’s Gift to Women and Wild At Heart is that they attempt to contain the mystery of that question in metaphors that translate its inherent sexuality into codes of combat, and clichéd ones at that. The “enemy,” of course, is Satan, but his names are legion: pornography, homosexuality, feminism, humanism, the monolithic foe Christian conservatives call, simply, “the culture.”
And by the way, turns out us gals don’t really like the sex so much:
In an interview with New Man, a Christian magazine, John Hagee, a popular pastor who is the author of What Every Man Wants in a Woman, explains what, in turn, every woman wants in a man (which is odd, since Hagee’s wife, Diana, is the author of a book of that name, and would have presumably been the more logical explicator): “nonsexual affection.”

Well, sure. That this is news to anyone is hard to believe. But more shocking is Hagee’s announcement that nearly every woman he’s counseled over the years has told him that “It’s really no big deal if I never have sex again with my husband.” This makes sense only if one accepts the division of identity increasingly popular in evangelicaldom: young men are knights and young women are virginal maidens, and even after marriage that formula, in a sense, continues: Men must get dirty in battle, women must stay pure at home. Sex is for the fellas.

Don’t know how much the boyfriend is going to like hearing that. Sorry honey; no more sex for me! Hand-holding will suffice from now on.
Make sure to read the whole piece…you’ll thank me for it.

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6 Comments

  1. Mike
    Posted April 29, 2005 at 2:19 pm | Permalink

    I don’t know. If you were having sex with some non-oral, missionary only, selfish pastor, you might have the same attitude.

  2. Posted April 29, 2005 at 2:59 pm | Permalink

    I was about to make the same crack. “with my husband” is the operative phrase there. With the neighbor–that’s a different story.

  3. Posted April 30, 2005 at 3:20 pm | Permalink

    nearly every woman he’s counseled over the years has told him that “It’s really no big deal if I never have sex again with my husband.”
    Jokes about adultery aside, if that high a percentage of women he counsels is saying that, it’s the male members of his flock he needs to be counseling better. Apparently these guys really don’t know what a woman wants (and reading & believing Hagee’s book will ensure it stays that way). There’s not much worse than bad sex (especially if that bad sex is with someone you supposedly love and it’s always a chore) – no wonder natural family planning works so well for these people, they probably only get it on (with each other) when pregnancy is the desired outcome.
    Hmmm, I guess we now know why the women in the religious right want other women not to have access to birth control, they want to punish those harlots for pleasuring their man (though why any self respecting woman would want to ensure Mr. “lie back and think of England” is beyond me.

  4. Posted May 1, 2005 at 3:53 pm | Permalink

    Why are you assuming every woman wants what you want?

  5. Posted May 1, 2005 at 4:56 pm | Permalink

    I personally liked to get slapped around and I hate orgasms, so the advice that y’all seem to want to give to women is bad for me.

  6. Posted May 1, 2005 at 8:24 pm | Permalink

    Marty:
    I’m not the one making assumptions. Hagee makes the gross assumption that the reason these women aren’t interested in sex with their husbands is that they are only interested in “non-sexual” affection. Unless he’s drawn his conclusions from a very small N, it seems odd that the only thing these women are all interested in is “non-sexual” affection. Most human beings that aren’t asexual want a well-rounded relationship that includes some degree of sexual and non-sexual affection (unless you’re here to tell us that good Christian women are all frigid and that it has nothing to do with their husband’s inability to effectively turn them on and/or pleasure them sexually/sensually/emotionally.

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